This may be my favorite episode of Raw that I can remember watching.
Who should you cheer, guys? Brock Lesnar has the belt and he's having fun in the desert somewhere. Roman Reigns has leukemia. Seth Rollins is on an island in a race that is gradually losing momentum. So, who left?
Elias? Oh, I'm sorry. Elias was beaten in a 3-in-1 attack.
Finn Balor? Oh I'm sorry. Balor was beaten in a 3-in-1 attack.
Sasha Banks? Oh, I must apologize again. She's on a tag team fighting the same people for six months. The same could be said of Bayley.
Round Rousey? Oh, you mean that lady who's cool, but she's still wearing strange makeup and participating in segments where she looks awful.
All that's left is Braun Strowman, and God, I hope you like big big guys. If not, you're out of luck.
I just do not know what to say right now. I think this will be a trend of this review. This show began with Elias being beaten by Baron Corbin, Bobby Lashley and Drew McIntyre and finished with Finn Balor being beaten by Baron Corbin, Bobby Lashley and Drew McIntyre. And I just do not understand.
I think the point is to build that vague and immeasurable feature in wrestling that we call "heat," but all you're building is dislike of that crap. You are building frustration. You are building apathy.
I'm so tired of cheering on guys and girls who do not pray to do something meaningful on the show. And I do not even know what else to say.
Rollins has an open challenge
Do you know what's amazing about modern WWE? No matter how bad the stories are, as long as you have an exciting champion who can face open challenges, it is very easy to entertain a crowd. All that is needed is a surprise. So who would it be? After a hiatus, who would challenge Seth Rollins' Intercontinental Championship? Was it a Lars Sullivan debut? Oooh! How about a return of Bray Wyatt ?!
… Lol does not matter. It's Dolph Ziggler.
Look, this is hard and I'm just joking. I think it's fair to mark how unconventional this confrontation is, but in fact I want to highlight Dolph Ziggler as the best part of this show. You know why?
He is an extremely talented leap. He played a wonderful game with Seth Rollins and then did what the heels should do: he lost. Not that you know that about the state of Raw these days.
So shout at you, Ziggler. You were not what I was expecting, but you silently crushed and gave us a rare reason to cheer. Kudos
Literally the worst segment
The segment Nia Jax x Ronda Rousey of this show was so bad that I had to pause the show and leave the room.
This was my break point with this show. I had my wrestling fill for one night.
How … how do I describe this? Have you seen a comedian bombarding your routine? Seeing that would have been more fun than Nia Jax's promo. And the substance of that was fine, I guess. She basically argued that Rouse Rousey is facing tough times while Jax herself has been on fire lately.
But who takes care? She bragged and rejoiced in all this while the crowd sat numb. The only thing that got a response was when she screamed about hurting Becky Lynch. If all you have is really hurt another wrestler …
And then it was Rousey's turn, and his talking segment was not much better. Her first words did not make sense, but fortunately she quickly strengthened herself and demanded a departure from Jax.
And then Jax said she was wasting time when Tamina was in the ring with her all the time. And then Natalya appears as if Rousey can not control herself. And then the Riott Squadron struck and ran at Nattie so the crowd had nothing to cheer about.
Yes, so if the rest of this review is caustic, blame that segment.
Dean Ambrose is vaccinated – This guy suddenly developed a germ phobia. Apparently he also sees Rollins as a walking germ.
I do not even know what to say. I think it's fun? But how … I do not know man.
Fight House Party def. The Renaissance "I do not even know how to explain it, much less whether I like it or not. The LHP basically has its own stipulation of matches and is beating the Revival in handicap matches. I think the point is to stick with old-fashioned guys, but it's not so much fun for me.
Drake Maverick pissed at Roode's robe – I really I hate this show.
Ember Moon def. Alicia Fox Curt Hawkins was in the ring. And Moons and Hawkins danced with No Way Jose later. Yes.
Jinder Mahal def. Joseph – I laughed a lot
Alexa Bliss holds a questionnaire – I really, really I hate this show. Basically Bliss tried to do what Corbin did by putting some friends on the field, but the women's division does not have a McIntyre or Lashley to help her.
This show was so bad I'm thinking of handing over my Cageside label.
I hope you enjoyed the review.
Two Faces. Because that's it.